My name is Misty I am but three last night my father murdered me...
A somebody
Im not here for you,
or anyone
Im here for me
and only me
Don’t push me aside
or forget about me
cause I’ll be pushing back
so u can hear me
I’m still here being me
staying afloat by all means
keeping on being me
Don’t think I need u
just to survive
Im just here to be by ur side
but I have no idea why
Im not a nobody
standing in ur shadow
I have my own soul
I am my own person
And don’t thisk other wise
Because as u can see
I am still me
a somebody
Now
Why control every move I make?
Not letting me choose my fate
Pushing me
pulling me
No time to myself
no fun
no joy
Just numbing pain
Nothing of my own
Not my happiness
Not my life
Nothing
My choices are not mine
they are yours
What I do
What I say
What can I do?
I wish freedom
On my own
Now
Voices
Voiced in my head
nagging at my thoughts
mixing up the words
Pushing and pulling
they make me stumble
My mouth can’t make the sounds
Confusing sentences
muffled bunch of words
thoughts that must be heard
idea to be spread
Opinions to be expressed
Secrets needing to be uncovered
Something is holding me back
Confidence, bravery, comfort
all missing
why voices, why?
Are my thoughts too lame?
Do they not deserve to be spoken aloud?
unworthy of a chance
Why do you hold me back?
Which side
With a savoir on one side
telling em to love
to hope
to be thankful for life
a demon on the other
telling me to hate
to give up
to dissolve life
Who to believe
who to trust
Who should I destroy?
What should I think?
Don’t think
don’t listen to the voices
listen to your soul
not your head
Hidden Behind
I am the one hidden behind the words and Brush strokes
I wonder what the end will be
I hear surrounding blackness
I see an eternal silence
I want to be happy as myself
I am the one hidden behind the words and brushstrokes
I pretend to be the confident person you see
I feel icy wet
I touch the sky
I worry who I am
I cry in rage and sorrow
I am the one hidden behind the words and brushstrokes
I understand that life is not always kind
I say whatever I think whenever
I dream of life
I try to be who I’m not
I hope to be free
I am the one hidden behind the words and brushstrokes
Meditation Escape
"It is not my anger,
It is not my hate,
It is not my war,
It is not my fate,"
Pulsates in my ears
Like the red in my veins,
As his bullet like words,
Tear through my soul,
"It is not my anger,
It is not my hate,
It is not my pain,
It is not my fate,"
Trembles my inner core,
Grasping at calmness,
Stilling my body and soul,
Numbing all existence
